1. |
The Name We Share
01:19
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There’s a name we share
A spot on the wall
I look for comfort there
And find none at all
And I miss you all the time and it reminds me
Of simpler times and how easy life did seem
And I miss you more each day
I love you and I miss you more each day
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2. |
Twelve Eighty-Nine
04:45
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I think accepting the truth hurts the most
You try to run away, but the pain keeps you close
And when the dust settles, when grief comes home
It’ll harden your soul and leave you alone
It’s every time I pick up the phone
I try to call your number, but nobody’s home
Back when death came early to collect your bones
I felt my blood run cold
Everything here feels old
And I’ve been watching the rain on the lake
That place you found peace in is showing its age
There’s a hollow sentiment like something will change
But I’m still holding onto my regrets
I wish you could have stayed
I just wish you could have stayed
And in every place you used to be
There’s a void with your shape and it stays haunting me
There’s this reflection that brings me to my knees
I want to believe that peace can come eventually
I see you in everything
I just wish I would’ve spent more time
And it’s haunting me
The name we share, haunting me
And I’ve been watching the rain on the lake
That place you found peace in is showing its age
There’s a hollow sentiment like something will change
But I’m still holding onto my regrets
I wish you could have stayed
I just wish you could have stayed
I wish that you could have stayed
For every day that I sleep away
There’s a night spent lying awake
Thinking of everything I could’ve changed
I’m noticing the distance I placed in the way
And for every day I should’ve spent on the lake
I’m sorry that I never saw it your way
I just wanted all of my selfish things
But missed out on days with you, living your dream
And for every day that I write you a song
There’s a thousand more I spend collecting thoughts
Of the person who raised me and the name that we share
and Twelve Eighty-Nine, how I wish she’d reach the air
And for every day that I sleep away
I’m sorry that I never saw it your way
Thinking of everything I could’ve changed
I’m noticing the distance I placed in the way
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3. |
To You & Sober Truths
03:49
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I still hear your voice in the halls of your old home
Where I’m always searching, chasing your ghost
But it’s all that I can do when all my words, they speak to you and sober truths
It’s been so long since I’ve seen you
And the air in my lungs has been heavier since
I’ve found no peace in adjusting for winds
They’ve come to take my hope away to some distant, empty place to stay
So there I’ll stay, a part of me still aches for change
But it’s all that I can do
Everything is emptier without you
The growing void is coming to consume
And I cannot escape it
I still can’t reconcile this truth, that I’ve come undone
I’ve grown astray and then succumb
But it’s yet to stop raining down here
There’s this grey cloud over all I hold dear
And if the flood takes me away to somewhere I can numb the pain, I’ll stay
There I’ll stay, ‘cause I can’t carry on this way
But it’s all that I can do
Everything is emptier without you
The growing void is coming to consume
And I cannot escape it
I still can’t reconcile this truth, that I’ve come undone
I’ve grown astray and then succumb
To everything that haunts my dreams
When I look in the mirror, I don’t see me
They keep saying we look just the same
And we share a name
But I can’t carry that weight
But it’s all that I can do
Everything is emptier without you
I keep memories in pictures of you
And I still cannot face it
I still can’t reconcile this
I just can’t believe you’re gone
I’ve grown astray, I’ve come undone
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4. |
Bad Heart
04:06
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I’m reminded each day
The tightness in my chest just won’t go away
‘Cause the devil in my ribcage has been staying at bay
But he won’t go away
So I’ll just wait
And I keep these thoughts locked away
What took you from us will come for me someday
But dwelling just keeps me awake
So bury my head in the sand
Closer to the grave
So tell me there will be a sign before I go
Say that I’m okay, say that you know
And tell me I’ll live forever if I try
Just say anything that gets me by
I’m reminded in ways
Like when I bleed it spells your name
Like the way that it keeps me counting the days ’til it takes me away
And I’ll have nothing left to say
But, “Will I meet you at those gates?”
So tell me there will be a sign before I go
Say that I’m okay, say that you know
And tell me I’ll live forever if I try
Just say anything that gets me by
Is there a bad heart in me?
We pass it down through the family tree
Is there a bad heart in me?
Was it the thing that set you free?
So tell me there will be a sign before I go
Say that I’m okay, say that you know
And tell me I’ll live forever if I try
Just say anything that gets me by
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5. |
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Am I supposed to feel okay?
I spent the day alone, this year on your birthday
‘Cause it’s been so long and I don’t feel any different
And the abyss, it haunts tonight
And I’m afraid I’m defined by it
It’s not going anywhere
Will I ever make peace with this?
As I’m waiting for the earth to swallow me up
I’m feeling older now
It’s been a long, lonely way down
As I’m hanging by a frayed thread of light, it burns
I’m sinking lower now
And I’m afraid that it won’t follow me down
(Won’t follow me down)
But still, I ache for better days
Though I spend most of my nights awake
Staring at the ceiling
Tracing lines to find my way
To the light on the window pane
It reflects and lights the frame
And locks my pain away
So it can stay another day
In its hiding place, the only thing I can’t face
As I’m waiting for the earth to swallow me up
I’m feeling older now
It’s been a long, lonely way down
As I’m hanging by a frayed thread of light, it burns
I’m sinking lower now
And I’m afraid that it won’t follow me down
(Won’t follow me down)
There’s comfort in the fact that we share a name
Like part of you’s with me in this worn-down state
But sometimes the thought can’t stop the ache
But sometimes, it can’t stop this
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6. |
A Spot On The Wall
05:11
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Reminded me to breathe
As it brought me to my knees
Was shaking on the front lawn
Her arms around me
Your friends were in the street
Telling me they’re sorry
You never meant to leave
And the memory haunts my dreams
I’m finding peace in frames
Hanging on the walls
Maybe one day I’ll be better
I know you’d want me better
But until then, I’m searching
At that place on the wall
I keep looking for answers
I keep waiting to resolve
There’s something in that spot on the wall
I can find comfort there when I can’t find any at all
We went through all your things
I took apart your bed frame
Pushed it all down the stairs
Breathing in vacant, stale air
Kept waiting for relief
One day, your mom said to me
“Grief never ends, but it changes”
And I felt this weight set free
‘Cause I don’t have to be okay
But I don’t have to stay this drained
I’m finding peace in frames
Hanging on the walls
Maybe one day I’ll be better
I know you’d want me better
But until then, I’m searching
At that place on the wall
I keep looking for answers
I keep waiting to resolve
I keep waiting to resolve
I keep waiting to resolve
There’s a name we share
A spot on the wall
I look for comfort there
When I can’t find any at all
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Common Ground Collective Los Angeles, California
Artist development company in Los Angeles, CA dedicated to spreading good vibes only.
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